'Running Sucks,' Says Entire World.

I just went out for a run in the brisk evening air, thinking that it would be a great idea to clear my head and make my body into a beautiful thing again. After several minutes of running, I questioned my previous reasoning that had me outside in the first place. I really don't know how I feel about running. It's like walking but really fast and with more effort and your feet are allowed to leave the ground between strides and you get really tired really quick, so that's neat. The thing about running is that when you say you really want to go running, that's a lie. Nobody ever really wants to go running, they just want to be in shape. If there was a way to drop 10 pounds and have some great cardiovascular health that wasn't running or some shitty thing like that, roughly 100% of people on earth would choose that alternative. In this way, we can create a flow chart to describe this process.